


Please leave a message.

by Underthegallowws



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Liam loves leaving voicemails, M/M, Theo has an answering machine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-03
Updated: 2020-08-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:13:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25688626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Underthegallowws/pseuds/Underthegallowws
Summary: Theo has an emergency phone. Liam loves leaving voicemails.
Relationships: Liam Dunbar/Theo Raeken
Comments: 8
Kudos: 139





	Please leave a message.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry this is crack. But I had fun Hope you are having a great day.

Hi. This is Theo. Leave a message.

_*Bip*_

Hi, this is Theo. If you’ve got this number, you are probably calling about an emergency. Call back immediately and I’ll do my best to get to you.

_*Bip*_

Hi, this is Theo. If you are Liam, please be reminded that being lonely is not an emergency. If you are not Liam, then call me back and I’ll get to you.

_*Bip*_

Hi, this is Theo. If you are Liam, please start learning how to text. If you’re not Liam, call me back immediately.

_*Bip*_

Hi, this is Theo. If you are one of Liam’s friends calling for him because I won’t answer his calls anymore, please forget about this number. Otherwise, you know what to do.

_*Bip*_

You are calling this number, so you probably know who I am. If you are an irascible werewolf, please do not leave another message about how I’m never answering my phone. Nobody leaves messages anymore, Liam !

_*Bip*_

If you think of yourself as part of the fucking puppy pack, which is a ridiculous name, do not leave a message.

_*Bip*_

Hi, this is Theo. Please stop leaving messages.

_*Bip*_

Hi, this is Theo. Please learn how to text.

_*Bip*_

Liam, you’re the only one using this number anymore. I’ve got a new phone. And you know it.

_*Bip*_

Hi Liam. Yes, I am aware the new phone does not allow voicemails. You’re the reason why.

_*Bip*_

Liam, I swear to god that if you leave another drunk message about my eyes, I’m going to punch you somewhere way more painful than the face.

_*Bip*_

_This user does not have an answering machine._

_This user does not have an answering machine._

* * *

Hi, this is Theo.

_*Bip*_

Fine, you want a special message just for you. So, yeah, this is Theo, and you’re probably Liam because no one else has called this number for three months. I would tell you not to leave a message, but I am well aware that you will not listen. So I guess you can leave a message. Please do not make me regret this.

_*Bip*_

Hi Liam. Leave your message I guess.

_*Bip*_

Hi Liam. Why do you keep calling this number WHEN YOU KNOW PERFECTLY WELL I CAN’T ANSWER BECAUSE I’M IN THE SHOWER ? I swear to god…

_*Bip*_

Hi Liam. Are you gonna keep leaving messages every single day for the rest of your days ? I’m like, three meters from you, dumbie.

_*Bip*_

Hi Liam. Your obsession with voicemails is slightly concerning. I’m currently looking for a therapist for you.

_*Bip*_

Hi Liam. Stop trying to find reasons to leave voicemails.

_*Bip*_

Hi Dunbar. You’re lucky you are hot because I feel like killing you every time I see a missed call on this phone.

_*Bip*_

Hi Liam. Yes, I love you too. Can you stop now ?

_*Bip*_

Liam, calling this number five times a day just to hear me say that I love you is not a good reason.

_*Bip*_

Hi Liam. No, I won’t change my voicemail to me saying what you know again. Stop calling.

_*Bip*_

Liam, seriously. You can’t blackmail me with this.

_*Bip*_

I’m in love with an asshole apparently.

_*Bip*_

Yes, Liam, I’m aware that I’m an asshole too.

_*Bip*_

Liam, I know that you love me. Stop leaving three minutes messages about it.

_*Bip*_

Hi, this is Liam. You’ve reached Theo’s emergency phone. Please keep your grabbing hands away from…

_*Bip*_

Hi, this Theo. I’m currently unable to answer any emergency call because I need to teach my boyfriends manners. Please hold.

_*Bip*_

Hi, this is Theo. So, I’m probably going to get rid of this number eventually. But as there is a hundred percent chance you’re Liam, I’ll allow you another message.

_*Bip*_

Hi, this is Liam. This number is no longer in service. I mean, yeah, Theo still has the phone but if you’re not me, then he is not interested. Have a great day !

_*Bip*_

LIAM STOP CHANGING MY VOICEMAIL.

_*Bip*_

THEO DON’T GET RID OF THIS PHONE.

_*Bip*_

… Hi, this is Theo. Theo Raeken. I’m in love with you too, Liam. I’ll keep the phone if you promise to never stop leaving messages.

_*Bip*_

Hi Liam. Leave a message.

_*Bip*_

Hi Liam. Love you too.

_*Bip*_

Hi Liam. I still listen to the messages, yeah.

_*Bip*_

LIAM YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE DID YOU REALLY ASK ME TO MARRY YOU IN A FUCKING VOICEMAIL ?

_*Bip*_

* * *

Hi, this is Theo Raeken-Dunbar. Leave a message !

_*Bip*_


End file.
